An Upstate woman who lost her two sons, sister and parents during a shooting at a Greenwood County home five weeks ago is speaking about the tragedy of losing her entire family.
Richard and Melissa Fields, their daughter Chandra Fields, and their two grandsons 11-year-old Ty and 9-year-old Asa Robinson were killed inside their Callison Highway home Oct. 29. Deputies said Bryan Sweatt shot all of them before turning the gun on himself.
For one woman, the loss is difficult to comprehend. Jade Fields Spencer is the closest relative to those killed and she said time has made her grief even deeper.
She's taken down every family photo, leaving her fireplace mantle nearly empty.
"If you look around, I don't have any pictures out," Spencer told FOX Carolina. "I still live like it didn't happen. I don't look at the pictures, I don't set pictures out and that's not the correct way to mourn, I know that but I don't know if I could go on if I was surrounded by pictures every day knowing this is the last I am going to see of them."
Sometimes she's angry, she has shed many tears, and many times, she said denial gets her through each day.
"The days go by and you realize in a month you haven't seen them, you know, so it starts to sink in, they're gone Jade... they're really not here," Spencer said. "You'll never see them again."
The last time she saw the five members of her family alive was Oct. 29.
"I remember that morning getting up and taking my two boys to school," she said. "That is something I will never... never thinking that when they got out of the car that I would never see them again."
But that evening, she would drive up to a crime scene no one could have expected with Greenwood County deputies in the yard of her parents' home. They told her Chandra's ex-boyfriend was inside with a gun.
"I'm asking, what's going on, what's going on... they're like we don't know, get down, get down," Spencer said.
She quickly learned that her young daughter and her sister's daughters were out of the house, but her two sons, her parents and sister were still inside. And she remembers the moment she was told they had all been killed.
"I said, it's not all of them. It's not all of them," Spencer said. "And he shook his head yes and I just fell to pieces."
The days after are a blur.
"I miss all of them, but to know that my kids didn't even have a fair chance to be, to be anything," Spencer said. "They were smart, good kids you know and they could have been anything and he just he stole that away from me and from them."
Now Spencer has to explain to her little girl, who is only 2 and a half years old, that her big brothers aren't coming back.
"She asks lots of questions that I don't know the answer to about where TyTy and Asa are and when I tell her they're in Heaven, she wants to go to Heaven," Spencer said.
The questions linger in her mind about the shooter, Bryan Sweatt, and if something could have stopped him. She said she still wonders who drove him to the family's home that day because it was too far to walk, and whether he gave anyone an idea of what he was planning.
Spencer said the only reason she will be celebrating Christmas this year is for her daughter, though it is just too difficult. Her sister leaves behind three young daughters.
Deputies said they have no new developments in the investigation.
There is a memorial fund to help with funeral and other expenses. The fund is set up as "Jade Spencer for Fields/Robinson Memorial fund" and donations can be made at any Wells Fargo branch.
Copyright 2013 FOX Carolina (Meredith Corporation). All rights reserved.